Open to Suggestions

what exactly makes lymph nodes feel less swollen? i remember being at TIP summer camp one year and having a lymph node on my throat that was so swollen i couldn’t sleep on my side at night. what did the dismal nurse at the health center tell me? “put a hot rag on it…that’s all you can do.” great. my assistant manager suggested vick’s vap o rub slathered on my throat and wrapped in a warm towel, which i have yet to try. while i have a sore throat, it is less inside and more just because the lymph nodes are so tight and sore that it makes my whole throat and upper chest tired. if you have a suggestion for how to make me feel less lymphnodey, let me know. also, if you feel like condemning the rev for doing this to me, feel free.

Editor’s Note: after a significant amount of whining from the rev, i have been asked to suggest that you not harass him for making me sick. it is not his fault, technically, that he has once again laid me low with a sore throat and cough. so for now, leave him alone. thanks.

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One thought on “Open to Suggestions

  1. Pete says:

    Rev’s Note: Believe not this woman’s assertion that I whine, for it is most certainly false. I merely requested that condemnation not be thrown solely upon me for present illness, as there exists no direct evidence of my guilt. From where and whence the virus originated remains a mystery. That is all.

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